ownself

recently i screwed up with a friend of mine.indeed i made a mistake.a mistake that to him could be never be forgiven which is uncovered his ass.but it wasn'y entirely my fault.well practically yeah.but untill when u wanna lie.sooner or later u will get cought.it just happened to be that i am the who blew it.
is it wrong to be a bad boy.i always believe that there would always a good thing inside someone life.i mean,doesn't mean that u surface is bad, means ur beneath also bad.why people wanna be hipokrit.i think people should percieve ones as they are.i can understand if ur family mad at you because of ur attitude,but frens.people says that frens that truely friends always support each other and if any of the friends make or made mistake,we should advice them,not scold them.for god sake friends are not parents.
to me if you can't accept me as the way i am then don't be friends with me.i understand myself.i know what is my good part and bad part.i do have many friends,but my best buddies is always a bad one on the surface.but i really love them.i know them inside out and that is why i love them so much.i never descriminate them of what they are.so waht if they are odd compare to others.but,does the others have the good thing like my friends inside them.all those stupid mother fucking friends only a friends,they are not buddies.
an english quoted' a friend in deed is a friends in need'.i believe that.i know that some of my friends actually make mistake or commit something which is illegal,but doesn't mean that i have to condemp them.friends are the one who always take care of their friends back.encouraging,understanding and advicing.
as a human being,no body is perfect.of course we made mistake either intentionally or accidently.sometime we just like what we do eventhough most people hated it.
i do have some friends who is as minnannar as i am and as noble as the 'wali'.but i believe they understand me well.i know and they know that what i am doing is wrong.to did adviced me but they have never look down or condempt me.that is a friends.i have been friends with them since i was in standard 5 and we still be friends now despite they know what kind of living that i live in with.
i treasure my friends sp much.especially friends that really2 know me.they are my strength.friends who are only to condempt me,i still be friends with them but not that close.i would limit with them.
frankly speaking,i am kindda pity those people who need who need to be hipokrit with their buddies.how can you lie to ur buddies if they truely are your buddies?to me it is better to be urself.let ur friends like u becoz of who u are,not ur mask.as a friend we can advice,not to judge.

this is me

This is regard to me.purposely for me.what i am going to ask merely just becoz i want to know about what people think of me.what people actually think about me.
i am just an ordinary guy,who is not that hansom(x hansem lansung pon),who have nothing.i am not a hottie,maybe just a wanna be where i am quite not very brave when it cometo women.
recently, i was labeled as a player.one thing that i barely understand people's perception,what does it take to label a person as a player?i mean i hardly talk to woman.i do talk to them but it is only becouse of work only,well i am the president of my club.
i am not deniying people's perception towards me.it just i am curious,what did i do till people say i am a player.what is the criteria of a player?sweet touge?i don't think i have it.good looking face?that would be outragously far.rich?that is what i am planning to do,now,still sengkek ar.heheheh.......
i did asked a friend about this,a female friends.even she said that i have the look as a player.'at what area' i ask?she said that maybe in the way i socializing with others.well basically i just talk much with male friends.i admit i did talk sometimes to female,but nothing regards seducing her.
it really make me wonder,where axactly did people sees me as a player.previously and all the time people would say that i am fierceful and scary(i know my look) and with my tempre,i understand their perception,but a player?doesn't a player should give good first impression on the first place.does a fierceful look give an amazing first impression look?i don't think so.
eventhough i always recieved this kind of comment as people first see me and i am kindda used to it,but it just make me wonder.i really wanna to know.well if i am truely a loser then i wouldn't mind,but i am so seriously fucking lame when it comes to woman,especially the hot ones.basically i always wait the girl to make the first move.it she wait for me,then forever it will not.
i know who i am.n i also have a very low self-esteem in addressing women.i just afraid.afraid to be called a loser.how can a loser can be a player?isn't it odd.
anyway,to whoever who knows me and read this blog i hope u can leave some comments on me.i like to hear people perception on me,but make sure it is a encouraging comments.i thank u for ur comments.

beautiness

what is the meaning of beauty?what consider to be beauty?beauty is very subjective that it can be measure and determine by many answers.it may resulting infinity answer.

people always want to have the best,the prettiest of what ever they want to posses.but how can actually the beauty u want actually meet ur criteria?is jane seymore beautiful?well of cause.she does look lovely.but does she really that beautiful,i mean all around?

y people always keep on asking themselves whether are they beautiful enough or not.why some people even get shy?

do u think the girl next is pretty?how u define beauty.she is not like jane seymore(above).should we be looking at every inch of their face in order to determine whether they are beautiful or not?

basically,both are beautiful and hideous.i must says that becoz god never created anyone or anything without purpose and not beautiful.i believe everyone have their own beauties.its just that sometime it hard to find that beauty.sometime we need to seek deep to find them.but some were just lucky that they beauty is clearly exposed to the world, not referring to pretty face only.well, blond are pretty,but most of them are bimbo,no offence but they are.

i believe that ones should find the beauty that hard to fade within oneself or other.that is to me the real beauty.if beauty meant to be forever,than there must be something,that is beautiful and last eternally.

i also believe that actually,the beauty of our self within that determine how beauty we are.if we can show to the world what beauty beneath us,that is when people will conclude as a beauty.

anyway and anyhow,everything and everyone in this sweet mother nature are beautiful.

Gunung Datok expedition

few days back i went up to gunung datok along with my UNITAR's mate.basically i was the organiser.well the plan actually had been set up months ago,only few days bsk i able to execute it.there were 30 of us all around.out of that only 11 guys,the rest is the eves'.
all i can say is that everyone was energatic about climb the 840 meters height mountain. Gunng datok is actually quit an easy trek mountain climbing (claimed by the internets reviewers).
so at 10 a.m we all start climbing.everyone as i said was energetic and eager to reach the peak. one thing that challenging about Gunung Datok is that the trek is only going up.there is no downslope at all. about first 100 meters everyone still excited, just as we across one tiny watercourse,the challenge begin. even i prepared practice for them,yet still its not enough.just about less tha 100 meters some of them already grumble the terk is like shit.it is not even close i picture it.i just love when they says that.
well,according to the expert and the reviews it onlly take about 2 to 3 hours to reach the top,but i predicted with my professional judgement with the help of Dr Amir(L.A.S) it would take 6 bloody hour.my prediction nearly hit the jackpot,but unfortunately,we all need only 5 hours.

as we reach the top,we all were kindda exhausted, but some still energetic to jump into the imaginarial rapid(well its only a lame watercourse).the best part is the journey to reach it where it is also our nearest water point is about 200 meters down below.we even lose a bit,but thanax to smart ass munirah and lame ass jerry, we managed to found it.we all had our bath for about 30 min,we went up back.the time was already 6.45 pm and it almost dark when we start climbing up.

ok,as we reach the peak again,we all were to tired to execute our cooking competition,so, teh iron lady munirah cook for everyone of us.i had my meal just about 10 minutes late but what i left for is only rice and curry and sardin gravvy.(poor me)but i still finished it up as i was straving to death.ooowwwwhhh...i forgot to tell you,my last meal was a chicken mcdeluxe at mcd at 4 a.m.

the rest of the nite is free activity so basically we just hang around and talking while having our malboro style coffee made.hhehehehehe.......

in the next morning,well everybody woke up at 5.45 am except for me.i go to sleep at 5.45 and woke up the last at 8.30 a.m.hehehe(i did sentry,ok).then around 9.30 after taking numberous of pic ,not me la, we started headed down.

at first it was great.the weather is cold, we don't feel tire at all,ok jsut a bit.but as we reached half way it started raining heavily like cats and dogs( i don't what they fought for)

as we all walk,2 of our mate,felt of the trek.both injured quit bad,but that is hiking(lol).

but i don't fall,i am a pro.heheheheh.i reached down after 2hours walking and running.as i reach i directly went for bath in the waterfall and polluted the water.half an hour later the 3rd group arrive and so on and so forth.the anchor reach down last along with the injured girls.

basically we all have fun up there.everyone have their own perception and excitement as well as crumble.but what the heck.all i know my event succeed,the first ever URAC event and as the main organiser i am very proud of it.

switching my blog

for whoever out there who knows me,well i shouldn't have to introduce myself anymore.previously i wrote my blog in my friendster,but i realized that as i write more blog,my previous would be lost and nfortunately,friendster did not provide any archive to store all the previous blog.so that is why i am swiching to blogspot.com.

i acualy don't write and read much when i was little. i is just recently i discover my new hobby which is writing.i felt,i not just meditate myself but as well as educate me,to be more prone to evolving myself in term of knowledge such as general knowledge as well as sharpen my english.

basically,blog work for me for releasing my tempre or even shout out my opinion and also my dissatisfaction.

i myself like to talk alot.well as an insurance agent,you do need to talk.i felt that writing is just like talking.when i talk,ideas just keep coming endlessly,but not when i am writing.i felt like shutten up.therefore,with blogging,i hope i may increase my capability to write so that i can thoroughly communicate in english fluent and effectively.